They think I'm being derisive
when I call them Tea Baggers
but I'm just being accurate.
Studies have shown that when
given a choice of six somewhat
outré sexual acts, members
of the Tea Party chose tea bagging
by a margin of 5-1, and with greater
prevalence that what was seen
in the submissive Dems with their safe
words or the vanilla-loving, no-sprinkles
Republicans. The data were robust,
statistically significant, and Lancet
reported all this several months ago.
You'd think the Liberal Media would
have run with the story, but you'd be
wrong. The New York Times and Huffpo
scuttled it for fear it would sex up
the Right, soak them in pheromone,
make them look oh-so-al-most French.
Tea bagging polls well with frisbee-
tossing college kids who don't vote
and school-budget-killing senior
citizens who do. Coffee, anyone?