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I Can Feel You Punishing Me From All the Way Away, Joseph

It’s awful as my bank statement,
all those red numbers. Probably. 
I will look later. I attain astonishment 
too often. Even the wallpaper knows
it overwhelms me. Its glue cackles. 
You do things I will look at later 
but never name. I  am someone 
who has learned my deficits. 
I am a good student and my brain
has your brain in it. A malignancy. 
Let’s not pretend we aren’t tied together
 by a stem running down the sky, 
rooted deep in me as all the atoms
that make me you as well as the whole
Mongol Empire. You need only to
drink   forage   frown   darken   ash
and it’s all over. There are no marks. 
Look, yes. Our bodies are lonely 
but not for this fuzz. I hate things
you want and I don’t know yes or no. 
Your saliva is glue. Each time I break off
I stay, an outbuilding I vowed to demo. 
We are a stinky pillow on the floor. 
The stench repels my dying dog. 
I don’t want to care who you take 
as your lucky coin, especially if it’s me. 
Of course I love you, but this long?
It’s a life of solstices. So much. 
I feel your eyes not on me. That. 
That is how you spank me. Joseph?
I am all the men in hell. I am past this. 
We should be proud another time. 
Thank you for me, but I am off
to feed myself to the wind.  

Posted 06/21/14
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