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I’ll Write my own History Books on the Pages of Cosmo.

Was once said
about me, and my relationships,
"he will always cheat because
he’s an artist,
and they thrive on
their turmoil,
it’s how they create."

well,
I’ve never cheated,
not in the fashionable sense,
though I suppose there are things wrong
with
having a tigress at home
and caring for a kitten.

was called
am called
one of those true
and absolute
tortured
brooding
artists,
well,
I don’t really believe it myself
but
cheers to them that may,

as to how I create
well,
sometimes I have it
and sometimes I don’t
that fire, that rocket, that explosion
in the clouds and in the ribs
knocking your bones together
til there’s nothing to do except
paint or write or die.

A poem
may have the subject matter
of a girl,
but the true meaning
is in the forest
not the tree,
Is it wrong to search for Love?
unbound and
unabashed
until finally
one comes to
the culmination
and the
compliment-ation
of a complete,
other human being?
I said once,
I’ve grown tired of that search,
that it doesn’t interest me anymore,
I’ve said that many times…

maybe I’m bad
for all the women
who’ve loaned me their lives,
unhealthy,
maybe they deserve more
than to be
"an artist’s girlfriend"…
search my paintings
and you’ll see for yourself
what it’s like
to be truly
alive
to touch the face
of a true god.

of course I’m unhealthy,
nothing is ever permanent
and when I’m gone,
when my "kind"
is extinct
you will all die.
Posted 07/17/11
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