On behalf of the Council,
we are delighted to inform you that your body is a temple,
albeit a limited time only temple.
Best if used by twenty-two;
after thirty-five please refrigerate.
As with any temple there are
certain terms and conditions.
For instance, on Wednesdays you can’t sit with us.
For instance, if on Wednesdays you do sit with us,
we have ways of shutting that whole thing down.
The Council relinquishes all responsibility for damages
incurred while wearing a very short skirt.
Misplaced affections must be reclaimed at the owner’s expense.
Failure to comply may result in mixed messages,
time running out, or reduced compensation.
Studies show that you should learn to take a compliment.
In our experience, there is no such thing
as the Babylonian captivity. In our experience,
all temples are the same inside.
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