The Secret Lines of the Second Vice Principal into the Barrels of Molasses Mandatory
Waterfalls are consenting adults,
and they are the merry warts
that scoop away the radio-active rugs
in Henry Beelzebub’s basement.
Henry Beelzebub went to Clockwork Orange
High School where he got a first
in gym tactics, uneven were the bare
lunettes glowing from the scantily clad
puppets who were the only Ponies in Disguise-Wise.
If any fines were paid to the principal,
if any fruit flies took reprisal,
they were not paid by the suck-up
secretaries of which there were three
because of the convocation of the bandstands,
because of Kilterations Daisy
taking place morning, noon and night
behind closed doors to avoid the hall monocles lately
behind the basis of too-tall Remedial Bleachers.
Lunch itself was paid for by detention,
until the cans of worms plowed a tunnel
to the freeway to Heaven through the Step-Twins
who were confined to caves with bats and not cats.
Up ahead in the Bar Car they said
they don’t have any quarters anymore
and would have to activate the Freight Engines,
ton to a ton where the matter is squared
but not seen, so go children of Rotweiler
Einstein the gay-beau gyno-delectician.
Whereat platypus went poldy
stole the gold the goose gave
to explorers of the wants of women
as if they all wanted the same things,
yeah right, Redcrosse Knight.
Now with the Holy Navel going underground
and the Holy Grail being out of town,
it was ticklish tabulation
not to mention in-betweeners
and leave it to the Best of Both Worlds
which is a Greasy Toad’s Girdle
as so much for Beelzebub Dairy
and its squeaky-clean fromage of cream.
And now you’ll have to excuse me
while I kiss this gay guy who is
actually a guy girl hand over
matter the nippy tease-happy squeeze.
They seem that they could not know or compose
which of Henry Beelzebub’s
otters are going to the State Fair,
and as the dial tone gives to the fire ice
and the ice marries fire twice as nice
spreading the joy around the Belvedere,
so the otters make their splash investing
in waterfalls as is seminarily known
in the affirmative waterfalls being cavernous
wherefore the days of summer call for a surrounding
the cavernous waters grant scores of diplomas for floundering
deployment of layers of waters are sweetness meet
to the gracious as well as to otters’ whiskers.
Especially Beelzebub had a lovely
otter make no mistake about undertow.
Under curtain conditions her eyes
were like the rubies but the mailroom slipped up
on the spare parts until refrigeration
system was on call and confidence restored.