100 Questions for the Presidential Debates
1. Why don’t you show yourself?
2. Why do you let your followers murder and rape us?
3. Why do you make your followers suffer so much?
4. Why are there so many conflicting religions?
5. Who can hear you and communicate with you?
6. Why is there war?
7. What is my purpose here?
8. Will I have life after death?
9. Why do bad things happen?
10. Is there intelligent life elsewhere?
11. How long will I live?
12. Why quantum mechanics?
13. Why turbulence?
14. What did Miss Susie’s steamboat do to deserve hell?
15. What happened to Natalie Holloway?
16. Do you think East Coast rap is better than West Coast rap?
17. What is your favorite internet meme?
18. Can you explain the popularity of anime to me please?
19. Do people with mullets know they have mullets?
20. WTF happened at the end of Lost?
21. Do you really love me?
22. Can I have a jet ski?
23. What do you think about Lana del Rey?
24. Why is Taylor Swift’s life so hard and full of breakups?
25. What happens when I die?
26. Why do dogs live only 1/7th as long as humans?
27. Why is sex so weird-looking?
28. Do you really care if I go to church?
29. Are there ghosts?
30. Could Jurassic Park really happen?
31. Do you sometimes LOL at Bill O’Reilly?
32. What would it feel like to jump into a pool of pistachio pudding?
33. What happened to my dog after he ran away from home?
34. Have you seen my spare cell phone charger?
35. Do I need (more) therapy?
36. Do you really care about abortion?
37. What platform do you think I should host my website on?
38. Do cell phones cause cancer?
39. Can you explain to me what my ex’s problem was?
40. What’s up with 2015?
41. How ‘bout those Vikings?
42. What is everyone on the internet so mad about?
43. Is childbirth painful because you hate women?
44. What’s your favorite thing to eat off a grill?
45. If you had to go to a desert island with only three things, what would you pick?
46. What do I need to improve the most about myself?
47. Do you think grad school is worth it?
48. Where can I buy the best tacos in the world?
49. Do you wish you had a bigger internet presence?
50. How are you going to update your brand to appeal to a younger demographic?
51. Does it matter who I vote for?
52. Do you think Cosmo is cool, or a tool of the patriarchy?
53. Is this mole cancerous?
54. Exactly how big is infinity?
55. Where do all those odd socks go to?
56. Who shot John F. Kennedy?
57. What’s beyond the Universe?
58. What existed before time?
59. What are wasps for?
60. Why do our bodies have two of most things, but only one heart and one brain?
61. How did all the animals fit in a single ark?
62. Why don’t insurance companies sue you for “Acts of God”?
63. Why is there pain and suffering in the world?
64. Why am I still looking for a job?
65. Should I marry this person?
66. Why did you let my family die?
67. Don’t you care?
68. What is wisdom?
69. Are you pleased with me?
70. Do I have the right motives?
71. Why can’t I hear you speak to me?
72. Has my fire gone out?
73. Does intellect get in the way of faith?
74. Do I try to fight battles only you can win?
75. What wisdom do you have for me today?
76. Am I using my resources to the fullest?
77. What are my spiritual gifts?
78. Do I see sins as you see them?
79. Do I see opportunities as you see them?
80. Do I see other people as you see them?
81. Should I view you as my God or my servant?
82. What wrong assumptions have I made about you?
83. If you could only tell me one thing, what would it be?
84. Have I lost hope?
85. Am I easily offended?
86. Are there any Scriptures I should do my best to avoid?
87. Am I fair to those who work for me?
88. Are you proud of my attitude toward money?
89. What exists in my life that shouldn’t?
90. Am I doing what you called on me to do?
91. Who is watching me?
92. What am I afraid of?
93. Do my political views agree with your Word?
94. Do I live as though I really believe in miracles?
95. In what ways are you testing me?
96. Why are there machineries in the body that work ceaselessly, just to one day stop forever?
97. Why do things perish with time?
98. Why don’t I have any control over my feelings?
99. Why do you make us get attached to things that have to end?
100. Why did you make us have expectations, knowing one day others would break them?